Friday, September 3, 2010

How to select your University Special Subject

Following is a true story and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

A guy came and told me that he is selected for two special subjects in UNI.(True story) And ask me how to choose the best one for him. (I know you are wondering - Even i was wondering why he asked me.).

Following are the 5 key factors you should consider -

1. Bro-Chick ratio of students selected to the subject
This is very important as it determines your attention, your availability of notes (More girls - better notes), your amount of finance dedicated for photocopying and for some other reasons as given in the chart. 
Taken from the sacred "Bro Code" Article no. 56, page 77.

But make sure you have at least another guy - i can give examples of many desperate bro.s who suffered alone in a chickaland.

2. Distance from the department to the canteen
Mobility, Accesibility are key words in today's corporate world. Time poverty is another key word. Not forgetting food crisis. All these phenomena makes distance from canteen an important factor in selecting your special subject. 

For your convenience i have the University map given below.

3. Quantity & Quality of 1st, 2nd year female students following the subject
Any business is valued by its future potential market. So is your special subject.

4. Amount of books available in the library for the subject
If its lesser - the better. 

Question : Ayya, does that mean i have to go and count the no.of books in the library.
Answer : No. Bro. Use technology. Only 7 steps.
1. Go to the library 
2. Sit on the book search computer. 
3. Click twice on the "e" sign on desktop. (Open Internet Explorer) 
4. Click on the bar and type (Go to google)
5. Put subject A name and click on search - Note down no.of search results.
6. Put subject B name and click on search - Note down no.of search results.
7. Select the special subject that returned less search results

NOTE :  
1. A statistical research by Nadheera Udawatthe indicated that google search results is directly proportional to the no.of books available in the same library
2. If you are finding step-7 hard (I.E.If you cannot count the search results, compare and find which one is highest - do not choose MATHS as your special subject)

5. No.of your own clique(set.a.k.a.Patthiya) selected to follow special in that subject
Bro.s do not break your two years fit-ness because of subjects (Because of other reasons such as a "girl-friend" is accepted as long as "koku"a.k.a-"hooking up" party is given). 

6. No.of consecutive vowels and consonants in the name of the subject.
For e.g. Zoology, Food Science, Physics and PBT are subjects you should not select.

7. Mobile network of the students selected to the subject
Many students conduct tuition classes in spare time (And lecture times) to find money to pay their mobile bills. So it is not advisable for you to select a subject with many people from outside your network. 
Exception : You have a dual sim phone.

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